HOW
WAS IT FOR YOU?
LEAGUE
AVERAGE PTS FOR : 104.83
LEAGUE
AVERAGE PTS AGAINST : 104.83
LLLLOSERS
SEASON
IIII DRAFT POSITION 12
AVERAGE
PTS FOR : 95.57 (12)
AVERAGE
PTS AGAINST : 112.19 (2)
PREDICTED
SCORE : 1549
ACTUAL
SCORE : 1338
DRAFT
GRADE : B
SEASON
V DRAFT POSITION 1
So Coach
Taylor falls from the top of the pile to the bottom in one effortless
season. An attempt to emulate last seasons QB / WR combo failed as
Ryan and Jones are clearly a huge downgrade from Stafford and
Megatron. Things could have been oh so different for the Lllosers.
In 4 of the first 7 game weeks they lost by less than a single
touchdown. With a bit of luck Coach Talyor could have been 6 and 1
and the half way stage. Week 8 saw the Super Swedes hand out the
beating of the season and from there on in the Lllosers were a broken
team. Despite finishing last, bottom of the pile and being crowned
the league's worst team, Coach Taylor will start season 5 as the hot
favourite to regain his title. Peterson, Foster or Rogers, the
Llllosers can take their pick.
WEST
COAST MAFIA
SEASON
IIII DRAFT POSION 10
AVERAGE
PTS FOR : 99.24 (9)
AVERAGE
PTS AGAINST : 105.41 (5)
PREDICTED
SCORE : 1414
ACTUAL
SCORE : 1389
DRAFT
GRADE : C-
SEASON
V DRAFT POSTION 2
Last
season the West Coach Mafia, completing under the guise of Dnickman,
stunned the league with a season long rant and a run all the way to
the playoffs. In Coach Cullen's second season reality hit hard and
the Potty Mouthed Pixed spent most of his time sulking quietly in
corner. Romo proved to a liability all season even when Dallas all
but abandoned the running game. A four game losing streak did for
the Mafia and their Coach just didn't have the wherewithal to turn it
around. With one season of brilliance and one of complete dross
season 5 will go a long way to determine whether Coach Cullen has
what it takes to complete at the highest level of fantasy football.
THE
LOTTERY
SEASON
IIII DRAFT POSITION 4
AVERAGE
PTS FOR : 101.64 (8)
AVERAGE
PTS AGAINST: 112.53 (1)
PREDICTED
SCORE : 1547
ACTUAL
SCORE: 1423
DRAFT
GRADE : B-
SEASON
V DRAFT POSTION 3
Great
things were expected of the Lottery following what was widely
considered as a good draft and they duly delivered with their best
season since official records began. Six and wins and second in
their division was proof, if proof where indeed needed, that Coach
Andy is finally finding his fantasy stride. It took longer than usual
but sure enough the Lottiers number 1 pick fell to an injury, MJD
also crashed out less than half way through the campaign, Big Ben's
injury completely nullified the threat of both Wallace and Milner but
other than that if was a trouble free campaign for the commissioners
favourite team. Despite their recording breaking season the Lottery
will draft a place lower than their usual 4th come season
5. With rumours of an off season franchise rebrand Coach Andy is one
to watch.
AUTOPICK
DISAPPOINTMENTS
SEASON
IIII DRAFT POSITION 6
AVERAGE
PTS FOR : 104.59 (6)
AVERAGE
PTS AGAINST: 100.62 (10)
PREDICTED
SCORE : 1664
ACTUAL
SCORE : 1464
DRAFT
GRADE : A+
SEASON
V DRAFT POSITION 4
It
all started with the draft as Coach Conor's Amstrad 646 PC and his
56k modem failed to cope with the demands of modern day fantasy
football. The results was an autopicked team that included the likes
of Rivers, Rice, Fitzgerld, Green and the Bears. But instead of
celebrating a strong draft Coach Conor immediately turned on his team
and the wounds he opened failed to heal throughout the rest of the
season. At the half way point the Autopicks were 4-3 and in the
middle of the playoff pack but the Coach Conor failed to react to
Rivers decline and a 4 game losing streak at the turn saw their hopes
fade and die. There is a strong case to be made that Coach Conor
under performed this season as he was unable to get past his draft
day disaster. With the personnel at his disposal and a lack of
meaningful injuries all season long Autopick should have remained
relevant.
HAIRY
FROG DISCO
SEASON
IIII DRAFT POSITION 11
AVERAGE
PTS FOR 98.19 (11)
AVERAGE
PTS AGAINST 101.17 (8)
PREDICTED
SCORE: 1584
ACTUAL
SCORE : 1374
DRAFT
GRADE : B
SEASON
V DRAFT POSITION 5
The
Disco's luck finally ran out this season as a series of injuries to
key players almost led to their first losing season in franchise
history. 'First round choice D-mac who has
only touched the ball more than 130 times once in the last four
seasons due to his injury record. More brittle selections occurred in
round 3 and then again in round four with Hakeem (foot) Nicks and
Michael Vick (heart)' Yes indeed, the draft
day review had seen it all coming. Run DMC didn't, Murry
wasn't mint and Vick was every inch the man we all thought he was.
The Disco finished bottom in what turned out to be the league's
toughest division despite the fact putting together a 4 game win
streak bettered only by the number 1 ranked Super Swedes. Truth be
told this was exactly the season Coach Calum needed. Students of the
league will remember that the Disco suffered the ultimate heartbreak
in last season's Carltonbowl. It's a well established fact that
after a heartbreak you are entitled to go off the rails for a bit
before returning stronger than every before. Expect the Disco to
fall back in love with the playoffs come season 5.
FEAR
FACTORY
SEASON
IIII DRAFT POSITION 5
AVERAGE
PTS FOR : 98.63 (10)
AVERAGE
PTS AGAINST : 107.66 (4)
PREDICTED
SCORE : 1545
ACTUAL
SCORE : 1380
DRAFT
GRADE : C+
SEASON V DRAFT
POSITION 6
Another
season of what might have been for our resident Hungarian wolf
farmer. The lack of production at running back did for a Factory
Team that at one stage still managed to put together a four game
winning streak and looked a near certainly for a post season berth.
Jennings, Leshoure, Jackson, Green, Coach Botond kept searching but
just couldn't find any rushing consistency. Drees still delivered in
the face of a bountyless Saints season, the receiving core posted
good numbers and the defensive rotation provide successful but those
darn running back just wouldn't deliver. Many believe that Coach
Botond's time will come but for now its a long wait until season 5.
SEVENTYNINE
FC
SEASON
IIII DRAFT POSITION 11
AVERAGE
PTS FOR : 103.64 (7)
AVERAGE
PTS AGAINST : 103.52 (6)
PREDICTED
SCORE : 1543
ACTUAL
SCORE : 1451
DRAFT
GRADE : C+
SEASON
V DRAFT PICK 7
Coach
Martin top and tailed his season in an ill fitting suit of
controversy. It began in the pre-season with the proposal of
transforming CNFLE into a keeper league. Battles lines were drawn
and a fierce debate ensued. The biggest concern was that a keeper
league would need the complete commitment of all concerned, something
CNFLE coaches have always proudly displayed in buckets. Fast forward
to the back end of the season and its only the very same Coach Martin
that threatened to throw the league into disarray by fielding a
series of inactive players! This was made all the more incredulous
by the fact that 79FC looked to be heading into the post season and a
possibly historic second Carltonbowl! Rumours reached the league of
trouble in the Coach's private life that had resulted in the
termination of his broadband connection! As we have already seen
with the Autopick Disappoints there must be harmony in all areas of
the franchise for success to materialise. We wish Coach Martin all
the best for the off season and trust he will return in season with a
fibre optic connection and his head in the game.
THE
BONE ROCKS
SEASON
IIII DRAFT POSITION 7
AVERAGE
PTS FOR : 107.31 (5)
AVERAGE
PTS AGAINST : 99.85 (11)
PREDICTED
SCORE : 1494
ACTUAL
SCORE : 1502
DRAFT
GRADE : C
SEASON
V DRAFT PICK : UNCLASSIFIED
Dismissed
by most of the league following an average looking draft the Rocks
benefited from a surprisingly weak central division to head into the
post season for the first time in their history. No team had a
weaker schedule with the Rocks only needing an average 99.85pts to
claim a win but to give the Rocks their due they cleared that bar
with plenty to spare and had been on a 5 game win streak before their
final week reversal against the Leader. Neweton has found form at
just the right time and rookie Martin has proved to be one of the
stand out picks of the season. Gore and the 49ers D have done the
job all season long and even Crabtree has stepped up to the plate on
a few occasions. The Rocks will now be seeking immediate revenge on
the Leader for the that week 14 defeat. Whilst Peterson could easily
post another 30pt haul we feel that that's the last 53pt return we'll
ever see from the Seahawks D. Big Ben was back and impressive for
the Steelers and could replace Kaepernick. Then again the thought of
defeating the Rocks with their own beloved 49ers signal caller at the
helm could be to much for the Leader to resist. ' With
the Swedes proving the doubters wrong in the North we could be
looking at an all Swedish final.' Foretold
the week 11 preview. A Valhalla and Carltonbowl end of season
spectacular? What are the odds?
THE
BENCH WARMERS
SEASON
IIII DRAFT POSITION 3
AVERAGE
PTS FOR : 108.36 (4)
AVERAGE
PTS AGAINST : 102.45 (9)
PREDICTED
SCORE : 1596
ACTUAL
SCORE : 1517
DRAFT
GRADE : B+
SEASON
V DRAFT PICK : 8
What
a strange season for the Bench Warmers are they yo-yoed from victory
to defeat and back again. This was the one time rookies third season
in CNFLE having made the playoffs at his first attempt. Last season
they finished a disappointing 10th and many in the media
were happy to write off Coach Richard as a one season wonder. What
then do we made of his 4th place regular season? Well,
for one, you'd think finishing fourth would be enough for a place in
the post season but due to the strength of this years Northern
division the Bench Warmers miss out. It must be a little like being
a Spurs fan.
Perhaps
the most frustrating aspect of Coach Richard's season has been his
inability to make the most of possible trades and a criminal lack of
activity on the waiver wire. It would appear that Coach Richard has
an eye for a good draft but his lack of focus over what is a short
fantasy season will continue to cost him for as long as he chooses to
suit up.
PAULS
POLARBEARS
SEASON
IIII DRAFT POSITION 1
AVERAGE
PTS FOR : 108.69 (3)
AVERAGE
PTS AGAINST : 101.46 (7)
PREDICTED
SCORE : 1661
ACTUAL
SCORE : 1521
DRAFT
GRADE : A
SEASON V
DRAFT PICK : UNCLASSIFIED
Coach
Pauls policy of missing the live draft finally paid off as his
auopicked rebranded franchise takes it first tentative steps into the
post season. The Polarbears opened on a record breaking 5 game win
streak before a crisis of confidence hit mid-season set against the
backdrop of unfairly harsh criticism from the press. Coach Paul came
out fighting and pointed to his many astute picks from the wire
(coach Richard take note!) and calmly steered his team to the
playoffs.
Questions
have to remain however as we will never know the team that would have
taken to the field had Coach Paul remembered to switch his computer
on back in late August. Will there be a break with tradition in
season 5? Will Coach Paul finally attend a live draft?
FRENCH
LEADER
SEASON
IIII DRAFT POSITION 8
AVERAGE
PTS FOR : 117.06 (1)
AVERAGE
PTS AGAINST : 112.09 (3)
PREDICTED
SCORE : 1599
ACTUAL
SCORE : 1638
DRAFT
GRADE : A-
SEASON V DRAFT
POSITION UNCLASSIFIED
How
did we miss French Leader? They topped the Southern Division, a
division in which the bottom team finished with a 7-7 record. They
scored more points than any other team in the entire league and
finished with a 9-5 record despite having the third toughest
schedule. So where was the love for the French Leader?
Coach
Laurent was the only Coach man enough to roll the dice on Peterson
and that particular gamble paid off in yards...and yards and yards.
Big Ben has had a decent enough fantasy season and Kaepernick did
enough when Ben was out. Johnson has found his stride late in the
season, perfect timing for the fantasy playoffs. Could the golden
Carltonbowl trophy be heading for France?
Comment
avons-nous manqué le chef français ? Ils ont complété la Division
du sud, une division dans laquelle l'équipe inférieure a fini avec
un disque 7-7. Ils ont marqué plus de points que n'importe quelle
autre équipe dans la ligue entière et ont fini avec un disque 9-5
en dépit de avoir le troisième programme le plus dur. Ainsi où
l'amour était-il pour le chef français ?\nL'entraîneur Laurent
était le seul assez homme d'entraîneur pour rouler les matrices sur
Peterson et ce jeu particulier a payé dans les yards… et les yards
et les yards.
Big
Ben a eu assez convenable une saison d'imagination et Kaepernick a
fait assez quand Ben était. Johnson a trouvé son pas en retard
pendant la saison, synchronisation parfaite pour les finales
d'imagination. Le trophée d'or de Carltonbowl a-t-il pu se diriger
pour des Frances ?
SUPER
SWEDES
SEASON
IIII DRAFT POSITION 9
AVERAGE
PTS FOR : 115.02 (2)
AVERAGE
PTS AGAINST : 98.96 (12)
PREDICTED
SCORE : 1559
ACTUAL
SCORE : 1610
DRAFT
GRADE : B-
SEASON V
DRAFT POSITION UNCLASSIFIED
Since
official records began only three team have delivered a record of 10
wins or more in a regular season. In Season 3, Dnickman (11-3) and
the Disco (10-4) and now in season 4 the Swedes with 10 wins and just
four defeats. It was a record that seen them enter the playoffs as
the number 1 ranked team.
Week
8 saw the Swedes post 183.88 to claim the best team performance of
the year. This is the same group of players that the collective
press had dismissed as the weakest Swedes outfit the league had ever
seen. They are the only team for last years post season to make the
return journey this time round. Stafford, Lynch, Thomas, Wayne,
Gronkowski, all players that you would have had on your pre-draft
planning but they all ended up in the arms of Coach Peter. He has
been voted the Coach of the Year by his peers, he has the Northern
Divisional title but all this will mean nothing without the Swedes
first ever Carltonbowl victory.
Amazingly
as we close the curtain on the regular season only four team have
failed to reach the playoffs since official records began, the
Autopick Disappointments, The Lottery and Fear Factory. Perhaps they
are just unlucky, perhaps they are just inept Coaches with a very
poor knowledge of the NFL. They join the Bench Warmers, West Coast
Mafia, Llllosers, Seventy Nine FC, Fear Factory and the Disco as the
nine month wait begins before the slate is wiped clean and we all
begin with the potential of a 14-0 season.
For
the Super Swedes, Pauls Polarbears, The Bones Rocks and the French
Leader, the dream is still very much alive. A dream that one day in
early January the postman will knock at their door and deliver a very
big, very shiny, Clartonbowl Trophy.
Good
luck gentleman.
Jim Marrs - 14-0
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