IF WISHES WERE HORSES - THE WEEK 2 PREVIEW

GAME OF THE WEEK

TTTTAYLOR v HAIRY FROG DISCO

Vick.

All time series record : Ttttaylor lead 2-1

Last time out : Ttttaylor 151 – 110 Hairy Frog Disco

The last time these two franchises met, it was to fight to the bitter end for Carlton glory in Carltonbowl III. The matchup this week takes on almost as much significance as that previous encounter, as the parchment that is writ the annals of Carlton history tell us, ‘no team in the long and illustrious CNFLE history has made the playoffs after starting the season 0-2, let alone won the whole darn shooting match’. Ttttaylor opened the season with a serious dose of déjà vu as they were beaten by less than a point after the Monday night match, as the Ravens whupped the Bungles. The same happened last year against the Disco but it merely served to set the tone for a tremendous campaign for Ttttaylor. Coach Calums Disco seemed to have all the components in place last week but left too much on the bench and if they had played Johnson, if they had started Morris and Smith, if Vick hadn’t thrown four interceptions then the outcome could have been so different. But as we know ‘if wishes were horses then beggars would ride’.

Ttttaylor toyed with the pundits earlier in the week as he installed Cutler as the signal caller for a time, however when it really mattered Cutler was swiftly removed and replaced by the King of week 1, Matty Ice. Good call. Cutler was intercepted four times and returned a paltry 5 points from Thursdays game. Whatever Ryan does now is a bonus in the coaching column for Ttttaylor although against Denver he may find it tougher than last week but should still have a healthy stat line. Vick struggled for the Hairies last week and faces an even tougher proposition against a rampant Ravens D. Vick himself has vowed never to have another performance like last week again and the game is in Philly which will help the erratic gunslinger however the Eagles could be without both starting receivers this week. The big news though is the proposed trade between divisional rivals 79FC and the Disco which seems to be sending RG3 across to the Swamp. Reviews have been mixed about the potential trade but Coach Calum has already announced that RG3 will start this week subject to the paperwork being completed in time. EDGE : TTTTAYLOR

Jamaal Charles gave a clear indication that he will be the #1 back in KC and returned over 80 yards on only 16 carries. Against a Buffalo D that was ripped apart by a very average Jets team Charles will look to return a similar yield. Bradshaw struggled against the revamped Dallas D last week but has an excellent matchup against the Bucs and could post a monster stat line if Manning gets the G-men ahead. For the Disco, D-Mac had a massive impact in the Raiders offence last week but as a receiver and not out of the backfield. This week against a Miami team that is woefully short in all departments McFadden should be in for a bonanza return. Cowboys RB Murray was outstanding against a much vaunted Giants D and faces a similarly tough assignment against the Seahawks this week. Much will be learnt about the Dallas back after this weeks action. It’s a close call as both teams have favourable matchups in general and great opportunities to score big, however if D-Mac can get some momentum it will prove to be the difference. EDGE : DISCO

Ttttaylors wideout –QB combo is once again the envy of the league, even after only one week of play. Julio Jones looks every inch the breakout player of the 2012 season after last weeks brace of TD’s and seems to have put his college catching issues behind him. Those who doubted that the ‘Bama star could be the next elite reader have already cut themselves a slice of humble pie and are getting the fork from the kitchen drawer in readiness. Ttttaylor put his top waiver priority to good use this week as he plucked jets receiver Stephen Hill from the body of free agents. Rookie Hill hails from Yellowjacket country which previously gave us Megatron. Measuring up similarly in stature pundits are already suggesting that Hill could be this years AJ Green. After last weeks superb debut, Hill may find things tougher against the Steelers though. The Hairies wideout woes have reached new levels of desperation already after rookie signing Alshon Jeffrey contributed a meager 0.7 points from his Lambeau appearance earlier in the week. Steve Johnson has a good matchup against a depleted Chiefs defence as does Nicks against the Bucs however it is not to difficult to imagine that the total posted by all the Hairy receivers will still add up to less than Jones on his own. EDGE : TTTTAYLOR

Ttttaylor have dumped Jared Cook and plucked Dennis Pitta from the waiver wire after the Baltimore TE added to his impressive recent run of scoring making it 5 in 8 games. Facing the Eagles in the city of brotherly love, he may find it tougher than last week though. Gresham continued the recent Hairy trend of contributing almost nothing to the team total last week with another measly return. This week we will see whether Gresham has developed at all into the sleeper candidate as the Bengals battle the Browns in the Ohio derby. Gresham has mustered 3 TD’s in the past two games against their interstate foe. EDGE : DISCO

Cundiff had a great day against the Saints scoring a massive 16 points last week and will get plenty of opportunities to kick this week against the Rams. Ttttaylors Bills defence was shredded last week by Sanchez and are surprisingly still installed in this weeks line up. Look for Ttttaylor to address this before the matchups start on Sunday. The Disco waived Mason Crosby after the Packers kicker made only two kicks last week and will be ruing that decision already as he plucked 13 points this week. Instead Houston will represent the Disco in special teams and defence with the Texans looking for another impressive week score against the Jags : EDGE DISCO

Despite edging out the categories three to two, the troubles that the Hairies have been having at receiver must be causing Coach Calum concern. Apart from Vick no other player contributed a score. After losing a heartbreaker at the beginning of season III Ttttaylor bounced back by scoring 170 points the following week to get their title winning charge started. Look for the same again. It could be a long season for the Disco.

VERDICT : TTTTAYLOR BY 9

PAULS POLARBEARS v THE BONE ROCKS

2 & 0 Baby?

All time series record : Rocks lead 2-0

Last time out : Coach Paul 92 – 122 Bones

Surely the only game between two unbeaten teams should be the game of the week cry the small market fans as they try to batter down the Commissioners door and maybe they are right, it should. However given the recent record of Coach Pauls teams and the fact that the Bones were rank outsiders after the draft, tv schedules have yet to buy into the notion that these two are legitimate title challengers. Nonetheless after this weeks games, one of the two will be unbeaten at 2 & 0.

The Polarbears have a Greg Jennings sized hole in their receiving corps which will be filled by Denarius Moore this week who now offers Carson Palmer a legitimate downfield threat. Bush came in this week for Sproles and returned a decent 54 yards but failed to make the endzone. Findley the Packers tight end fared even worse with only 0.6 points after fumbling. Percy Harvin will have to have a monster game against the Colts and manning will need to bounce back against the Bucs if Coach Bryants boys to post a credible score this week.

With a full 9 players yet to play, it does appear that Coach Lars is in fact a genius in a professors white coat who has found the philosophers stone. Cam Newton will hope to take off where RGIII left off and roast the leaderless and timid Saints D who are clearly playing with their tail between their legs. Doug Martin had a good debut last week but may find it tougher against a better front line in the Big Blue. Andre Johnson looked back to his best last week for the Texans.

With only 6 points in the bag so far it looks a tall order for the Polarbears to make a match of it, and given the fact that the Bones own the bears over the years it looks like Coach Lars will be heading into the next round of divisional matches with a pair of valuable wins.

VERDICT : ROCKS BY 10

TIM RIGGINS BENCH WARMERS v SEVENTY NINE FC

All time series record : Riggins lead 2-0

Last time out : Riggins 126 – 86 Niners

The trajectory for both teams has followed similar paths over the past couple of season. Both had great campaigns in S2 and then fell spectacularly from grace last time out. What remained consistent is that Riggins have so far had the Indian sign over the Niners, even in their Championship winning season.

Riggins have bookended their team lineup with Rodgers and the Packers D and both contributed on Thursday (although it does look as if the scores should be the other way round) as the Pack D scored an excellent 29 to help the Bench warmers to an solid 41 point head start. Spiller is the feature back in Buffalo now and should have a ton of success against the Chiefs and is the Start of the Week for Wk 2. Reggie Bush is the Miami offence, Bryant and Cruz are both quality options out wide. It should be a good score this week for the rookie.

After last weeks impressive divisional victory Coach Martin traded away his back up QB RG3 for Albert Morris who is set for another great week against the Rams. How long Shanahan keeps faith in the rookie running back is a question no-one can answer but whilst Morris has the hot hand it would be a fool who would leave the Redskins back out of the line-up, (subject to the paperwork all being signed of course). Brady will rip apart the Cards, as will Ridley, Lloyd and the Patriots defence. The big question is how long will Coach Martin keep playing Richardson who was a big disappointment in week 1? Graham is a lock to gain 20 points this week and continue his fine form against the Panthers.

Despite the current healthy advantage held by the Bench Warmers the Niners have the weaponry to make this a close call. However CJ Spiller will make a mockery of those who sniggered at his selection and ride the rock home for the Riggins boys.

VERDICT : RIGGINS BY 7

SUPER SWEDES v IT’S A LOTTERY

The Fantasy Mirror.

All time series record : Series tied @ 1-1

Last time out : Swedes 124 – 108 Lottery

Despite their draft day disappointment coming on the heels of their playoff exit the Super Swedes got back to winning ways last week after seeing off the Benchwarmers. For the Commishes beloved Lottery it was normal service resumed though as despite all the pre season hopes and words they slumped to a disappointing opening day defeat to the unfancied Rocks. At one stage the lottery were 90 points behind and on for a League record defeat.

Stop the press… Coach Peter has benched first round pick Matt Stafford in favour of the Ravens field general Flacco? After a flawless performance last week has the fifth year starter finally found his feet? No matter what the thinking it is still a massive call for the Swedes and could cause a QB controversy in weeks to come. Green Ellis looks to be in for a great season and will continue his rare form against the Browns this week. Reggie Wayne returns to the Swedes starting lineup after his stellar week one performance and add some value in the wideouts as he faces a Vikings team that will concede a bucket load of points.

The good news is that Manning Snr looks like fully fit and like he will be a valuable contributor of points over the coming weeks. The bad news is that aside from McCoy thats about it for regular stream of points. Welker appears to be the odd man out in Foxboro and Jones Drew will need a few weeks to get back up to speed. MJD faces a stout Texans D who will be keying in on Pocket Hercules to force the galloping Gabbert to throw to beat them. Wallace is the latest wideout to land on Revis Island subject to the Jets man being fit so don’t expect much from the Steeler. Tough week again for the Commish.

When Coach Bryant starts to bait you, it’s time to take a long hard look in the fantasy mirror. After consecutive 4 win seasons much was expected of the Lottery this year, however it appears that the transition from Central division whipping boys to Carltonbowl challengers may take longer than expected. A win here for the Swedes and Coach Peter will take control of the North and given the relative performance of his rivals it starts to look good for a return to the playoffs.

VERDICT : SWEDES BY 14

WEST COAST MAFIA v FEAR FACTORY

Coach Cullen.

All time series record : Mafia lead 1-0

Last time out : Mafia 113 – 88 Factory

The manic howling that could be heard all over the Emerald isle was nothing to do with Bono’s sound check in the Guinness factory we understand, but Coach Cullen doing and Irish jig of delight after his Mafia team positively stole the win last week against our current Carltonbowl champs by less than a point. Fear Factory dropped a tough loss against the Niners but will be pleased to note that his Fear Factory squad easily outscored his divisional rivals and will be hoping to get back on the winning tack.

Has the league got a new luckiest team? Needing 23 points to pull off an improbable victory, West Coast Mafia scored exactly that to break Ttttaylor hearts. However any luck they may have been granted by the Fantasy fairies soon deserted them when Forte limped off on Thursday after contributing 8 points and looking good for a decent haul. WR1 Nelson also in the same match and Gould’s meagre 4 points suggest that the Mafia are threatening to implode in week 2. Hernandez will need to snaffle all the TD’s for the Pats and CJ2K must get better for the Mafia to have any chance at all, although he faces a Chargers D which stifled D-Mac last week. It looks like the potty mouthed pixie will be relying on Romo. Oh dear.

Like the Mafia, Fear Factory have had to deal with early season injury after FJ went down in Buffalo. Cedric Benson stepped up on Thursday and looks like a credible running game option moving forward. What will really hurt is the 2.4 point return from Brandon Marshall. No-one saw that coming. Coach Botond has some Sunday homework to do this week as Garcon, Austin and Gates are all carrying niggles and their status should be monitored closely. Brees will get back to form against the Panthers and we like Donnie Brown to be a sleeper this week against the Vikes in Andrew Luck’s home debut.

Despite the constant tirades and threats from the Mafia, it is difficult to find any credible evidence to suggest that they can win this matchup. Factory have the better player matchups, the better players and more players yet to play. So why then do we think that Coach Cullen will win? The threat of concrete overshoes..? No, it’s just that the Mafia are this years lucky, lucky, lucky team, sponsored by Kylie.

VERDICT : MAFIA BY 1

AUTOPICK WARRIORS v FRENCH LEADER

French Leader dodged a bullet.

All time series record : Series tied at 1-1

Last time out : Warriors 98 – 120 Leader

Despite being the Coaches pick for team with the best draft, Coach Conor’s fears were realized against the Polarbears last week as his Autopick warriors struggled early and gave themselves too much ground to make up before losing by 11. French Leader dodged a bullet in the curtain raiser last week when they chose to keep Peterson on the bench. Nonetheless they are off to a flying start after beating the Disco for the first time in their history and will look to gain further ground in the chase for the South. Both teams have their full complement of players to come.

With Mathews and Mendenhall still doubtful to play, the Warriors will persist with the Rice and Williams one two punch. Rice is an elite option but will find it tougher against the Eagles than against the Bungles. If Williams can’t get it done against the Saints this week it may be time to look elsewhere. Wideout is where the Warriors look strongest and we think Bowe will have bumper week against the Bills. Call the coastguard, the Raiders D could harpoon the Dolphins.

Peterson is inserted straight into the lineup after proving his quality last week. Megatron faces the 49ers in what will be an early examination of the Lions title credentials, which will be tough. The Saints receivers should make hay this week but whether Colston gets his fair share of looks is always difficult to predict with so many receiving options in the Big Easy, although it should be noted that he does have good numbers against Carolina. Jackson may struggle against a Redskins D that looked good against the run last week.

This matchup is a tight one. Neither team shone last week and both posted sub 100 scores. The winner will be decided by which set of receivers get their act together and as the Warriors have three excellent options we like the Autopick boys by a whisker

VERDICT : WARRIORS BY 3

Wins for Ttttaylor, Rocks, Riggins, Swedes, Mafia and Warriors this week to leave the Rocks, Swedes and Mafia all unbeaten. No wins in the South may indicate how the balance of power could be shifting north. Disco, Factory and Lottery remain winless after two and will have to make history to make the playoffs.

Just the facts ma’am.

 Carl and Bob.

Latest odds supplied by Vasco De Gama

West Coast Mafia 4-7

Ttttaylor Evens

Super swedes 7-4

Bone Rocks 9-4

French Leader 11-4

Seventy Nine FC 3-1

Tim Riggins Bench warmers 5-1

Autopick Warriors 5-1

Hairy Frog Disco 7-1

Pauls Polarbears 7-1

Fear factory 7-1

It’s a Lottery 10-1

ITS A THIN LINE BETWEEN LOVE AND HATE

  

GAME OF THE WEEK!

WEST COAST MAFIA V TTTTAYLOR

Defence wins titles?

FANTASY PREDICTION – MAFIA BY 13

FANTASY REALITY – MAFIA BY 0.42

Carl and Bob know a game of the week when they see one and so it proved as the potty mouthed pixie took on your very own Carltonbowl champions in a week 1 encounter of epic proportions.

The Mafia struck first with loveable loser Romosexual posting 32.48pts but as soon as the Sunday nights games roared into action Coach Taylor let rip. Some may accuse the silent one of being a one trick pony but its a damn fine trick. Last season its was Stafford to Megatron, this season its Ryan to Jones. I for one prefer the look of Ryan to Jones as their names are shorter and therefore quicker to type. 64.26pts from Atlanta's dynamic duo and you can pretty much stick a fork in it. WR Smith chipped in with 13.60pts, RB Charles stayed healthy but failed to find the endzone and had to settle for 8.70pts but it was all looking good for the Champions. But behind the blinding pts blitz from Ryan and Jones a flaw was emerging in the Coach Taylor masterplan. The Buffalo Bills defence. Last season the monk like Headcoach had shown an uncanny knack for pciking out the best matchup based defence but in the season opener it was all going horribly wrong.

But we all know that defence matters little in the world of fantasy right? That's why we all leave them alone until late in the draft. Even the once mighty Ravens D were now widely accepted to be past their sell by date. “Not (expletive deleted) so!” yelled Coach Cullen as he implored the Baltimore unit to had him an unlikely come from behind victory. 13Pts, 4 sacks, 1 interception and 1 fumble later and Coach Cullen had won by less than half on one point. Don't blame the player, blame the game.

ITS A LOTTERY V THE BONES ROCKS

MJD.  Facial hair not a problem.

FANTASY PREDICTION – LOTTERY BY 6

FANTASY REALITY - ROCKS BY 25.62

The more things change the more they stay the same. So say the legion of Lottery fans who watched their beloved franchise make yet another disappointing start. Any early season optimism was washed away by a woeful Welker, a horrible Hillis and a dreadful Decker. On the positives side of things high risk pick Manning looks set to be the Lotteries best QB in years if he stays healthy, Wallace grabbed a TD and MJD proved he can run despite carrying the extra weight of his facial hair.

Coach Lars will be satisfied with avoiding the embarrassment of losing to the Lottery. With WR production that his opponent could only dream of this one was never in doubt. Had the Bones Coach gone with Super Cam and Gore the victory would have been even more emphatic. There are options for the Bones that would appear to point to a positive campaign ahead. Could this be the year when Coach Lars breaks free from the shadow of his fellow Swede?

PAULS POLARBEARS V AUTOPICKS WARRIORS

Akers.  It..could...go...all...the..way!!!

FANTASY PREDICTION – WARRIORS BY 10

FANTASY REALITY - POLARBEARS BY 10.08

Coach Paul claimed victory in the leagues first ever autopick derby as the Polarbears took an early lead against the Warriors and held them at arms length for the rest of this match up. In a shocking turn of events RB Foster proved to be the Bears leading points provider. Who would have thunk it? Elsewhere it was steady production all round. Manning Jnr and Jennings will surely have better days but it may be unwise to rely on Akers kicking 63yrd field goals every week. It would be ironic for Coach Paul to win the Carltonbowl only to be kicked out the league for missing so many damn drafts!

The rift between Conor Di Canio and his Warriors was clear for all to see and the players lived up to their Coaches pre-season expectations and lost. QB Rivers is a worry, any QB outscored by a benched Carlson Palmer has to be worry. Running back Williams didn't and WR Bowe looks to be who we thought he was. With four RB's on the roster and only one capable of any production Coach Conor needs to reach out to his fellow Coaches and offer up a masterful trade his order plug the holes in his sinking franchise.

SUPER SWEDES V TIM RIGGINS BENCH WARMERS

C.J. Spiller.  Would of, should of, could of.

FANTASY PREDICTION – SWEDES BY 3

                                             FANTASY REALITY - SWEDES BY 26.28

The Swedes chalked up win number 1 in a match up that was closer than the final score would suggest with Coach Peter having to wait until the late late Monday game to be assured of victory. RB Green-Ellis could prove to be a master stroke, the unheralded pick that performs above expectations and lays the foundations for a solid score. WR Thomas looks to be another picks that will offer a healthy return on a regular basis. QB Stafford underperformed with 3 interceptions and 17pts but those 355 pass yards still read impressively. On this showing the affable Swedish Coach will be there or thereabouts come the end of season four.

The Bench Warmers problems, along with the Lottery and the Hairy Frog Disco, suffered with lack of production at wide receiver with Cruz and Bryant failing to break double digits. Whilst Coach Richard may berate his receivers but the man he should really be having a stern word with the is Coach Richard. Took a look at the Bench Warmers bench and the winning points are sitting there in the shape of C.J. Spiller!

FRENCH LEADER V THE HAIRY FROG DISCO

Peterson.  Back?

FANTASY PREDICTION – DISCO BY 7

FANTASY REALITY – THE LEADER BY 6.62

Disco fans won't be dancing after this worrying start by last years heartbreak finalists. Throughout the preseason the swamplands have have been trying to come to terms with Coach Calum's decision to start the QB with no heart. Somehow the Disco's signal caller ended this one with 22.88pts despite a four turnover performance that had Coach Wilson hurling an array of obscenities that would have made Coach Cullen proud. Vick's histrionics took away the focus of the Disco's real problems, their shambolic receiving core. 3 WR's and and a TE for just 17.5pts or roughly half a Julio Jones. Coach Wilson has a worrying history of being unable to pick a WR or TE, a bit like Sir Alex Ferguson and goalkeepers, sure every now and then he'll luck out but for the most part its a series of busts. Running backs and defences? The Disco Coach will find studs year in year out but Wide Recievers? Its almost like he doesn't see the point in throwing the ball.

The French Leader, who has yet to take a holiday this season, was complimented on his draft by his week one opponent and whilst a 99.80pts total is nothing to write a postcard home about the W is in the onion bag. Coach Laurent was faced with a similar dilemma to Coach Elliott's Lottery do you start your questionable RB? Start your studs cried the pundits but both Coaches chose to leave their stars on the bench for week 1. For the Leader a win and 20.70pts from a benched Peterson is the definition of a win win but we confidently predict this is the last time you'll see the Vikings RB sitting out a Leader match up. Solid not spectacular the Leader needs to maintain focus to ensure a productive season.

FEAR FACTORY V SEVENTY NINE FC

79FC.

FANTASY PREDICTION – FACTORY 3

FANTASY REALITY - SEVENTY NINE FC BY16.68

Season 2 Champions Seventy Nine FC set about rebuilding their reputation with a regulation win against the Fear Factory. New England's RB Ridley, who? Outscored New England's QB Brady with New England's WR Lloyd contributing 6.90pts. It was left left up to New England's defence to seal the win with a surprisingly productive 23pts. A handful of players from outside New England did suit up for the 79ers but failed to deliver.

For the Factory it was and all or nothing performance. QB Bress and WR Marshall being the all, RB's Jackson and Benson being the nothing. The Factory have an abundance of riches at the WR position with benched WR's Moss and Ogletree outperform the receiving core of the Lottery, Disco and Benchwarmers. If there was only some way that you could swap the players you don't want with players you do want with another team. Hmmmmmm.

So week 1 is done and done. The waiver wire will reveal its bounty sometime tomorrow and I have a feeling that the league first trade may be completed before we meet again. It's been a poor week in the world of predictions for Carl and Bob that doesn't mean you shouldn't join them for the Week 2 available sometime this Saturday.

Good luck gentlemen.

Jim Marrs.

HUMILIATING ANNIHILATION - THE WEEK 1 REVIEW

GAME OF THE WEEK

WEST COAST MAFIA v TTTTAYLOR

Coach Cullen.  Potty Mouthed Pixie.

All time series record : Ttttaylor lead 2-1

Last time out : Dnickman 95 – 170 Ttttaylor

As tradition dictates the CNFLE Champions kick off the season against the team with the best available regular season record, however with Dnickman no more after a franchise reboot we are left with Coach Cullen’s new project, the West Coast Mafia, opening up against divisional rival and current CNFLE Champ Ttttaylor in a reprise of one of the most exciting rivalries of Season III and of course a chance for the potty mouth pixie to make amends for the humiliating playoff annihilation in Season III.

Last year Coach Cullen rode the back of the Rodgers train all the way to the playoffs. Picking from spot 10, Rodgers was never going to fall that far, so the Mafia bade their time and a borderline elite QB was snaffled at the beginning of round 4 in Tony Romo. Although the Dallas veteran divides opinion on whether he has the cojones to take Big D to the big one, there can be no questioning his talent and with the season opener done and dusted Romo has already provided an outstanding 32 points to the Mafia week one total. Matty Ice has been tipped by many pundits as being on the cusp of a breakout campaign and with the suggestion that Atlanta will be moving toward a heavy passing offense to utilize Jones & White to full effect, Ttttaylor may have picked up a bargain in round 6. With the Chiefs premier pass rusher unavailable to harry and chase Ryan across the field the Falcons field general should have a great day. EDGE : MAFIA

The Mafia used their first two picks in the 2012 draft on running backs and will be hoping to benefit from consistent scores week in week out from both Chris Johnson and Matt Forte. With the Bears up against last years basement club Forte should see a heavy workload this week. The big question in the windy city is whether back up Bush will take away any carries around the goal line as he did in Oakland. CJ2K will have a major impact over the course of the season but generally has had limited impact when facing teams with one of the elite QB’s and if the Pats get away from the Titans in Tennessee Johnson’s role in a catch up offence may take a hit. Ttttaylor surprised everyone when Jamaal Charles was taken with the first pick of the second round, however it pays to remember that only 12 months ago Charles was a consensus top 5 pick. This week Charles faces a Falcons defence who has been fairly decent over the last few years and could easily stuff Charles early. Bradshaw forms the other component of the one - two punch and despite struggling to get much joy against the stout Cowboys D still picked up a score to return 15 points for RB2, a decent return in anyone’s book. EDGE : MAFIA

At wideout the Mafia are led by Jordy Nelson who had a blistering end to last season. However against a 49er defence he may find it more difficult to get open even though the game is at Lambeau. Nelson is accompanied by Vincent Jackson who will be hoping to start afresh in Tampa and Sidney Rice who is the #1 guy in Seattle , which isn’t saying much to be fair. Ttttaylor will be hoping that all the pre season hype about Julio Jones doesn’t come back to haunt him as he burnt his #1 draft pick on the Crimson Tide alumni. The connection with Ryan will be key to Ttttaylors success and against KC we like the big mans chances. Steve Smith takes the two slot and has a tantalizing matchup against a Bucs defence that has struggled to master Newton in his fledgling career. With big play guy Torrey Smith making up the Tttaylor trio this department could be where the Champ gets back on track. EDGE : TTTTAYLOR

Coach Cullen just loves his New England tight ends and what’s not to love? After missing out on Gronk this year, the vociferous Coach went for the next best thing and snapped up Hernandez who has a fantastic match up against the Titans. Brady will spread the ball around and it is conceivable that Hernandez and the Gronk could be number 1 & 2 in the Pats receiving stats this year. Ttttaylor has taken a late round flyer on a potential impact sleeper in Jared Cook. Cook seemed to be developing a rapport with Locker at the end of last year but the Pats only allowed 3 TD’s to tight ends all year in 2011 so may find it tough sledding this week. The fact the Locker may be passing often when the Titans fall behind could work in Cooks favour but not enough to give him the edge over one of the Leagues top tier Tight ends. EDGE : MAFIA

The Ravens have long been one of the top defenses in recent years and once again this year they look to have put together an impressive unit. Their matchup with Cincy is intriguing as it could go either way if young gun slinger Dalton has made progress. Gould is one of the best field goal kickers and despite usually unfavourable conditions in the Windy City will always return a high yield. Ttttaylor has plumped for the up and coming Bills defensive unit which has been strengthened by the arrival of Mario Williams from Houston. Word on the street (y’all) is that the Jets offensive mess and the improved Bills schemes could see the Bills ‘D’ take this one home. Henery is a promising young kicker who will get plenty of place kicking opportunities this year for an Eagles team that is expected to fly Eagles fly! EDGE : EVEN

Every game counts, especially the first few games of the year as they can set the tone for the early bouts however the Champion is often the team that finishes the season strongest and we can see a repeat of last years outcomes for these two top teams as the Mafia will ensure that Coach Cullen gets off to another flying start whilst Ttttaylor drops the season opener for the third time in three years. Hmmm, how did that turn out for them?

VERDICT : MAFIA BY 13

PAULS POLARBEARS v AUTOPICK WARRIORS

All time series record : Coach Conor leads 4-0

Last time out : Baptists 142 – 149 Royale

The first week pits together the two teams that had computer aided assistance during the draft, and whilst Coach Paul has accepted his fate and will work with the hand he has been dealt, Coach Conor took the unprecedented steps of rebranding his disgraced franchise to eliminate any possible connection between this motley crew and his beloved Royale with TD’s. It also pairs two teams who are sporting new franchise identities and two teams that have never made the playoffs in CNFLE history.

The Polarbears are led by the impressive Arian Foster. Foster is however still listed as questionable which may impact the number of carries that the Houston rock toter will accrue in the season opener. Manning Jnr disappointed in the season opener so Coach Paul’s hopes of amassing an impressive opening day total to eradicate the memories of past Baptist campaigns fall onto the shoulders of Percy Harvin who we feel will take on extra touches until AP is fully fit and Darren Sproles who has an excellent matchup against the Redskins. Greg Jennings could hit a home run, but will be shepherded well by a tough 49er secondary.

Despite not picking any of his first 10 players, Coach Conor managed to wind up with a pretty strong looking team. Anchored by one of the elite backs in Rice who is in line for a big game against the Bungles, DeAngelo Williams is the undisputed RB#1 in Carolina with Stewart ruled out and can cover until Mathews is fit again and a WR corps of Fitz, Green & Bowe that are the envy of all. The warriors picked up Gonzo on the waiver wire as cover for a laboring Witten and that proved to be a masterstroke as Witten only picked up one lone point.

Both squads looked to have playoff potential once the dust had settled on the draft, however Coach Conor’s tweaks and the ‘injury’ to Foster give the Warriors the edge.

VERDICT : WARRIORS BY 10

SUPER SWEDES v TIM RIGGINS BENCH WARMERS

A despondent Swede.

All time series record : Series tied at 2-2

Last time out : Swedes 135 – 97 Riggins

An air of despondency seemed to be evident in and around the Swedish camp after the conclusion of the draft but with the start of the weeks games and the fact that Riggins have spent their top two receivers for a below par return of only 14 points means things could be looking up for Coach Peter. This matchup pits together the past two winners of the North Division, Coach Richard will be hoping that his Bench Warmers return to Season II form and recapture that divisional crown.

Much of the Swedes scoring will depend on Matt Stafford having the same sort of season as last year and against an appalling Rams team he should make waves. Trouble is that the Lions may get ahead and wind things down early. The Gronk was a revelation last year and look for another big season this time round which will get started today against the Titans. The Law Firm will struggle to make headway against the Ravens as will McGahee, so much will depend of Manning Snr finding Thomas and whether Amendola can become the new Welker in the slot.

Despite the opening day disappointment of Cruz and Bryant, there is still just enough firepower left for the Benchwarmers to make this an interesting contest, starting of course with Rodgers who will rack up a minimum of 30 points on a weekly basis. Turner is a must start against a depleted KC defence and Bush is the only credible offensive option for Miami so will see plenty of action although will find it tough against the Texans.

It is often the case that when an early draft pick is expended on a star QB the team can fall into the trap of becoming a one man team. Both teams spent their first round pick on signal callers and the season will live or die on their performances. What can make the difference between success and failure for a team of this kind is how the supporting cast responds, and with the Benchwarmers behind schedule with two played, the edge in this contest now lies with the Scandinavian franchise, but only just.

VERDICT : SWEDES BY 3

IT’S A LOTTERY v BONE ROCKS

All time series record : Rocks lead 3-1

Last time out : Lottery 112 – 111 Rocks

After consecutive 4 win seasons, Coach Elliott has taken the unprecedented steps of bribing the pollsters to give his ailing franchise a much needed morale boost before the season kicks off in earnest. Coupled with the bookies insistence that Coach Lars and his Bones are the rank outsiders this year in the ‘Group of death’ and the fact that the Lottery beat the Rocks on the final day last year to give them their first Divisional win for two seasons make this indeed a tantalising open week encounter.

Lottery drafted hard and drafted well this year and whilst their picks may not be immediately table ready, they still have sufficient cover in week one to put up a good show. McCoy will run riot against the Browns and is our start of the week. Hillis will get 15 touches per game and many will be near the goal line so could put up a decent total without actually running for many yards. Welker is still a quality option despite the Contract issues and Manning Snr could be a steal in the fifth round if his revolutionary surgery at the hands of Doctor Crippen was a success.

The Rocks are an enigma. Is Coach Lars a genius in a fools hat? Despite continually being written off at the season start, they have yet to post a losing record and have only missed out on the playoffs by a whisker in both previous campaigns. With the Jets passing game in such a mess, they have opted to return to smash mouth football which means Greene may finally reach his potential. The 49ers D is an elite unit but will get battered in the Bay. It will be interesting to see how Martin goes against the Panthers as the Bucs RB could hold the key to Bone success over the course of the year. Shaub will light up an inept Miami. There are points to be had today.

Week 1 is surely too early for a must win game, after all we still have 13 whole weeks to go and it’s not how you start, but how you finish, but in a group that contains the current Champs and had the team with the best season record for the past two seasons a win here will provide hope to the victor that they can be competitive for the duration. McCoy will be the difference in this game.

VERDICT : LOTTERY BY 6

FRENCH LEADER v HAIRY FROG DISCO

Vick.  Handle with care.

All time series record : Disco lead 3-1

Last time out : Leader 133 – 107 Disco

Can the self proclaimed Jerry Jones of the CNFLE pick up his distraught Disco franchise after the disappointment of last years final or will Coach Laurent inspire a French renaissance and lead his improving ‘French’ ise to the playoffs for the first time in CNFLE history. Pollsters consider this to be a matchup between the top two South teams, however with all four teams in this division competitive that call is way to early to make.

Murray has contributed 17 already to the total as RB2, but Nicks disappointed with only 4, however 20 points from two is an acceptable return. Is this the year that D-Mac lasts the pace for a whole season? He has a positive matchup against a rebuilding Chargers this week. Vick could explode against the Browns but he may have to do it with his feet as the Browns secondary is pretty good despite their woes elsewhere. Look for the Texans defence to destroy Miami led by a rookie thrust into the arena without a sword, shield, net, tridenty thing or even any shoes.

French Leader had a blinding draft, no question and at full strength on an average day the talent on this team should be enough to beat anybody, however this week came too early for Peterson to be considered 100% and whilst he may get 10 or so carries, is it enough to warrant dropping Brown who will fill in himself for the injured Mathews in a good matchup against the Raiders? Jackson will see action early but will end up not being much of a factor against the Lions who will be out of sight by the half. On the plus side Megatron will score over twenty this week as the Leagues top receiver and Big Vern has a great matchup against a Packers D that gave up 9TD’s to TE’s last year. Big Ben will spray the ball around against a Denver team as the Pitts running game is a mess.

Some have suggested that if Coach Laurent had not taken a mid season sabbatical then the French would have won the South instead of the Disco. For the Disco the question remains whether last years heartbreak has taken its toll on the team selection process as the Disco line up is a who’s who of high risk, high reward players which is great at the start of the season when all are fit.

VERDICT : DISCO BY 7

FEAR FACTORY v SEVENTY NINE FC

Brown.

All time series record : Series tied at 2-2

Last time out : Factory 71 – 69 Niners

The challenge for Coach Martin is to recapture his Season II form which saw the Niners crowned CNFL champs as last years title defence proved to be too much to handle as his top 4 draft picks all bombed. After an encouraging start to last season, Coach Botond’s Fear factory fell agonizingly short of turning the second worst team in season II to a playoff team in Season III and becoming the CNFLE fairytale franchise..

With 3 players already in the box, including the kicker and defence the Factory already have a 25 point advantage. Look for Drew Brees to torch the Redskins to consign the Saints bounty-gate demons to the preseason. Fred Jackson could find it tough against a traditionally strong Jets D, but Brandon Marshall should put up big numbers against a Colts team in his first competitive reunion with Cutler. Gates will also score well against the Raiders now that he is fully fit.

Seventy Nine have mortgaged the season on Terrific Tom who will have a monster game against the Titans. Coach Kent hopes that with all the talk about Gronk, Hernandez, and Welks, Bill decides to play a game of misdirection and get Lloyd and Ridley involved under the radar. The new face of the Brown franchise, Trent ‘Tank’ Richardson is still questionable so the Niners have taken Brandon Jackson as cover should the ‘Bama back not be good to go. Pitts wideout Brown will hope to benefit from Wallace’s off season inactivity and the fact that Big Ben will throw a lot, and we mean a lot! Niners will hope that when Brees connects for the factory it will be to Graham who could easily become the favourite target in the Big Easy.

Prior to the Season opener, the forecast for this matchup was for a Factory victory, however with the Giants poor defensive showing the door of opportunity has widened for the Niners. Whilst we still think that the Factory will have just about enough to win this one it could go either way.

VERDICT : FACTORY BY 3

Wins for the Mafia, Warriors, Swedes, Lottery, Disco and factory this week to get things going, however nothing is won in Week 1 of the season.

 Carl and Bob.  Back where we belong.

Latest odds supplied by Vasco De Gama

West Coast Mafia 4-7

Autopick warriors 5-6

Ttttaylor evens

Hairy Frog Disco 2-1

French Leader 2-1

Fear factory 5-2

Super Swedes 3-1

It’s a Lottery 5-1

Tim Rigginsg Bench warmers 5-1

Pauls Polarbears 5-1

Seventy Nine FC 5-1

Bone Rocks 6-1

Carlton's NFL Picks III

 

For those coaches needing some light relief from the rigors of the CNFLE season we recommend Carlton's NFL Picks III. Simply sign up to a free CBS sports account and then click the link below...

http://cnfle.football.cbssports.com/e?ttag=FFB10_cbsinv

Our Pool password is: Carlton

Now correctly predict the winning team and crown yourself Carlton's NFL Pick Champion.  For the record our current Champion is Coach Calum.